THE MAGNOLIA VOLCANO

When  Rise`  and  I  married,   she  had  two  daughters  by  a  former  husband,  and  a  stepdaughter  who  decided  to  go  with  Rise`  and  not  her  father.   Rise`  then  bore  three  boys  to  me   (in  addition  to  a  little  girl   we  lost  due  to  a  cord  accident).  The  boys  are  Joshua,  Reid  and  Jeremy.

I  greatly  enjoyed  fatherhood.    Every  night,  at  bedtime,  we  did  prayers  and  story,  in  that  order.   Prayers  always   preceded  story,  since  they  always  stayed  awake  for  the  story.  Prayers  were  standard  Catholic  prayers,    made-up  prayers,   a  chapter  of  the  Bible,  a  psalm,   and  one  Baltimore  Catechism  question  and  accompanying  discussion.   The  story  was  either  made-up,  or  a  picture  book  from  the  children's  section  in  the  library  at  Voorhees.

One  of  the  non-fictional  stories  I  told  the  boys  was  the  tale  of  the  volcano  Paricutin  in  Mexico,  which  had  grown-up  out  of  a  cornfield  during  the  Second  World  War.   

One  of  my  made-up  stories   was  "the  Magnolia  volcano  story."    We  allowed  the  boys  to  dig  deep  holes  in  the  sand  under  the  back  yard  swing  set,  to  entertain  themselves.  I  turned  that  into  a  story,    were  they would  dig  so  deep  in  the  back  yard  that  they  would  accidentally   get  down  to  the  magma  underneath  the  Earth's  crust  and  unleash  a  volcano.  The  concept  of  a  home-grown  volcano  kind  of  spooked-out  our  youngest,  Jeremy,  who  was  around  5  at  the  time.

One  day  in  November,  1994,    the  boys  were  home  for  the  Thanksgiving  holiday,   and  it  was  cold  outside.     Jeremy   was  down  the  basement,  playing.     I  told  Rise`,  "I  want  to  play  a  practical  joke  on  Jeremy.  He's  afraid  that  he  actually  could  start  a  volcano  by  digging  too  deep  out  back.  So,  I'm  going  to  make  sure  that  he's  not  disappointed!"

I  filled  up  the  hot  water  kettle  and  put  it  on  the  stove  and  heated  it  on  "HIGH"   until  it  was  boiling.    Then  I  said  to  "Littlest"  (my  nickname  for  Rise`),  "I'm  going  to  take  this  water  and  pour  it  all  into  the  hole,  and  it  will  make  all  kinds  of  steam  outside  in  the  cold!  Tell  Jeremy  that  you  think  that  a  volcano  is  starting."

I  ran  outside  and  poured  in  the  full  kettle  of  boiling  water.     It  steamed  wonderfully  in  the  cold  November  air.   As  I  did  so,  Rise`  went  to  the  cellar  steps  and  yelled,  "JEREMY!  JEREMY!  COME  UP!    THERE'S  SOMETHING  WRONG  IN  THE  BACK  YARD!   THERE'S  STEAM  COMING  OUT  OF  THAT  HOLE  YOU  DUG!    I  THINK  THAT  YOU  REALLY  DID  START   A  VOLCANO  OUT  THERE!"  Rise` did  it  perfectly.

I  finished  pouring  the  water  and  ran  behind  the  house  while  Jeremy,  completely   thunderstruck,    came  up  out  of  the  basement,  and  came  outside  without   a  jacket   and,  to  his  most  intense  astonishment,  actually  saw  steam  rising  out  of  his  hole.  He  stared  and  stared  and  stared  at  it,  and   crept  slowly   down  the  steps  toward  this  steamy   aperture  in  the  Earth's  crust  which  he  had  created.

Behind  the  house,  as  I  watched  this,  I  was  almost  exploding  with  laughter.    That  made  me  move,  and  Jeremy  caught  the  movement  out  of  the  corner  of  his  eye,  I  exploded  into  laughter,  and  he  immediately  knew  that  it  was  a  joke.  "DAAAAD!"  he  scolded.